What's Out

Hey, hey, it's the weekend here in Shitsboro and we're looking for something to do.  Any suggestions?

Didn't think so.  Since you've got nothing and I've got nothing, we might as well catch up on movies. 
I've been completely out of touch for the last six weeks or so.  I don't know what's out, what's getting good reviews, what's doing well at the box office. 

On the planes from Atlanta to Frankfurt and back, I was able to watch 5 movies: 

- Parker, a generic-and-then-some actioner starring Jason Statham, with Jennifer Lopez the only thing worth a damn in it

- Identity Thief, the very funny box office hit with Jason Bateman's incomparable straight-guy act stealing the show from Melissa McCarthy

- The Last Stand, a surprisingly sturdy and well-made comeback for Arnold Schwarzenegger as a border cop in a small town that finds itself in some Rio Bravo-like trouble 

- Jack Reacher, one of the most forgettable films Tom Cruise has ever been a part of; dumb, dumb, dumb 

- Stand-Up Guys, a decent vehicle for Al Pacino and Christopher Walken (refreshingly vulnerable) as a couple of old criminals; Alan Arkin's in it too. 

But what has been out at the theaters the last month or so?  According to Entertainment Weekly, this is what I've missed:
(I've categorized the movies into what I want to see and what I don't)

Looks Good
Before Midnight  - the best-reviewed American movie of the year so far (along with Mud), it's the final entry in an unforgettable trilogy.  Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy are now married and living in France with kids.  That's all I want to say or ever read about.  For intelligent moviegoers, the Before films are priceless and unforgettable. 

Black Rock - a tough, nervy actioner about three women (including Lake Bell and Kate Bosworth) who find themselves stuck on a remote Maine island with some creepy, hyper-sexual guys.  Preview looks good. 

The Hangover III    - all right, one more time won''t kill me...

World War Z    - based off Max Brooks' best-selling humor book, this is anything but a comedy.  Yes, it's blood-thirsty zombies run amok in the future, with Brad Pitt as a humanity's last chance.  I like our odds. 

Now You See Me  - A group of Las Vegas magicians (Jesse Eisenberg, Isla Fisher, Dave Franco, and Woody Harrelson) pull up on-stage bank robberies that confound an FBI agent (Mark Ruffalo).  Looks like it might be a lot of visual, convoluted fun - the cast includes the enchanting French actress Melanie Laurent (Inglourious Basterds), Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, and Common. 

I'll Pass

I'm sorry, but despite Man of Steel's solid reviews, I think I'm just done with Superman.  Though Michael Shannon as the villain, Amy Adams as Lois Lane, and Kevin Costner and Diane Lane as the Clark Kent's parents all make tempting offers. 

Fast & Furious 6 is about five too many of those movies for my taste. 

After Earth, the big-budgeted sci-fi movie directed by M. Night Shyamalan and starring Will and Jaden Smith, looks awful.  Critics thought it was awful too. 

The Internship is a comedy that re-teams Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson as a pair of aging failures who compete with a bunch of brilliant college students for an internship at Google.  Blah. 

This is the End is a loose, self-referential movie about a group of Hollywood actors (Jonah Hill, James Franco, etc, all playing themselves) whose wild night of partying is ruined when... a catastrophe hits L.A.  Got great reviews - critics say it's funny as hell and unpredictable.  Okay, I'll see this one. 

The Bling Ring is Sofia Coppola's newest movie, a based-on-true-events tale about a group of L.A. teens (including Emma Watson) who break into the homes of celebrities.  All style and not much substance, according to reviewers. 


Here's the box office winners so far...

The Great Gatsby, Fast &Furious 6, Hangover III, Star Trek Into Darkness, Iron Man 3, The Purge (no idea what this is), Monsters University, This is the End

After Earth was a huge flop, and The Internship and The Man of Steel haven't done as well as expected.